So I went on a date with this guy. We were set up by a mutual friend whom I had hung out with in NYC over NYE.
I was on the master cleanse so we just went for tea at Urth Caffe. He was super cute. He’s on the short side, but look who’s talking (not an issue). He was smart, sweet, and easy to talk to. But, he wasn’t very flirty or playful.
“OK,” I thought to myself, “this is an adult relationship. We sit and talk and get to know each other. We don’t just use sexual energy to connect. Or booze, or music.” (though I do want to connect in those areas too at some point…)
After an hour, he abruptly decided he needed to go back to work.
“Don’t take it personally, Jordan, you’re just sober.” I thought to myself.
“OK,” I said, “But can you drive me home, please? I walked, and I get cold on this liquid lemon shit. Also, FYI, I’m a big drinker, don’t get the wrong idea about me on the cleanse. The next time you see me, I’m going to be loaded,” I (half) joked.
He took me home. Thanks, bye.
I told my friend who set us up that I liked him and I thought it went well. You know, open to getting to know him better.
Well, I may as well have been drunk. I was that wrong.
After taking a few days to decide how to handle my friend request on facebook and email I had sent to follow up on a discussion topic we had over the tea, I get the following facebook message:
Hey Jordan
I got your email but in the flurry of my fire drill day at work i think i deleted it cuz i can’t find it right now
anywho . . . it was good to meet you and break tea. I’m a straight shooter and seeing as this was an evident set up by Mr. XXX I figured I should relay that I’m not really vibing our compatibility . . .
but i love your spunk and a+ go-getter and creative attitude. it was fun to meet you and to share stories. crazy our mary and lisa connections.
I’m sure we will connect again and/or I’ll see you on a screen, big or small, sometime soon.\
best.
XXX

So I wrote back, “Oh, no! Is it because I’m such a drinker?!?!”

React as you will. But I MUCH prefer and appreciate being told upfront that he’s not interested than just being blown off, which most men find an acceptable and desirable course of action. His honesty and maturity is refreshing and kind of classy, no? This may be harsh, but it’s not nearly as rude. Moving on.